My Tips For Having 2 Kids Under 2 Years Old
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How do you manage with two children under 2 years old?
My two kiddos are 15 months apart.
My daughter Sofia is 21 months (man oh man I cannot believe she’s almost 2! It’s scaring me!), and my son Dimitrius is 6 months.
This journey of motherhood I’ve been on so far with these two little peanuts has been such a great adventure, and has shaped me so much as a person.
I’ve become so much calmer! That’s for sure!
I honestly haven’t even been a mom for that long, but I have learned a few things, and I hope you find them helpful!
So.
How have I survived and still been really productive? Let’s chat a little about my tips for having 2 kids under 2.
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Be flexible
My first, and probably biggest tip is to stay flexible.
Now I don’t mean the kind of flexible where you can touch your toes (which I can’t always do btw), or wrap your leg around the back of your neck.
I mean be flexible with what you expect to get done, what you expect your children to do, and how much you can stick to a schedule.
Just adjust all them expectations!
A lot of moms out there are big into schedules, but I tried that with my first, and honestly it stresses me out more than it helps.
It’s just not for me.
I like to fly by the seat of my pants, as they say.
It’s just my personality. I just go with the flow of our days, neither of my kids are really on much of a sleep or food schedule, especially the baby. I just have learned to read their cues and that seems much simpler for me.
Obviously, we are all different so schedules might totally be your thing! And that works great too. But if they aren’t your thing, don’t feel guilty when you see other mamas’ schedules and highly organized days on Instagram. Just try each style and see what works for you!
Highly rigid schedules put such a high expectation on what little children can do, and it makes it stressful if someone strays from the plan.
You know those parents (I totally used to be one!) who are like…
“no, we can’t do that, because it’ll make Timmy 10 minutes late for his nap, and he is never late for that!”
Not too long ago we were at some of our family’s house until after 9:30. Which is about 2 and a half hours later than Sofia usually goes to bed.
And ya know what?
It was super fun! And super good for the kids to experience something different like that!
And they didn’t even die from being 2 hours late to bed!
Create A Daily List Of Essentials
Luke was actually the one who suggested this to me, and it’s been really helpful since I tend to be an over-achiever!
Each day I’ll just write down two or three things that I have to get done that day. And those are the things I’ll work on first, amongst the changing of diapers and breastfeeding.
Here is an example from last week…
- Process one canner load of bread and butter pickles
- Edit half of my moby ring sling tutorial for YouTube
- Wash Dimi’s diapers and put them in the dryer
So for me, that is doable for one day without getting overwhelmed. Whereas, if I just looked at my entire list of 50 things, I’d get so stressed because I knew I couldn’t do it all, and I’d get nothing done!
So that is a good idea for keeping your day productive and stress-free. It isn’t a complicated schedule, but it gives some direction to the day.
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Prioritize Your Marriage
The best way you can love your kids is by loving your spouse.
Children shouldn’t grow up thinking that they are the center of the universe like so many do in these days. They will be set up for a huge shock when they enter the world as adults.
As Christian parents, we prioritize God first of all, then our marriage, then our children. By doing that, we can actually take better care of our children.
As a child, it just makes your life feel secure when you see your parents loving each other and in a good stable relationship.
I want to give that gift to my children.
When I pour into Luke, and then he pours into me, we are so much more capable of parenting our kids.
Teach Them To Take Good Naps
This has been absolutely fabulous.
People are constantly asking me how I can get so much stuff done, and this is one of my secrets. I’ve become so efficient in my little window of nap time.
That will free up hours of your day if you teach your kids to go down for naps easily and especially if you can line up naps so they are both sleeping at the same time!
Sofia takes one 2 hour nap, and Dimi takes 3 naps that last anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours. Sofia’s one nap and Dimi’s second nap also line up at the same time so I have some time totally to myself to get work done.
As a baby, my daughter was a pretty bad sleeper and we ended up sleep training her starting at 4 months and she wasn’t totally sleeping well until around 8 months.
And sleep training literally saved me from going insane.
We use the ferber method. So it isn’t a totally cry-it-out method, but it is still very effective.
I’ve just this week started a little sleep training with Dimi because he was taking several hours to fall asleep at night. Once he falls asleep he does great, but the bedtime routine was getting very long!
He is catching on so fast, it is crazy! I feel like we found the sweet spot for sleep training him!
Babywearing
The sleep tip kinda goes along with this one, because it saved me so much time to have my son sleep in a wrap / sling / carrier for the majority of his naps until just recently!
I literally don’t know if I would have survived without this.
Especially once my husband went back to work after a week or so, and I was all alone with the two babes for the first time, it was so essential!
In order to take care of the housework, gardening, canning, cleaning, online business work, and keep the kids alive, I had to wear Dimi a lot.
Babies just naturally want to be right with their mamas and that is so good and normal! I saved so much time by just letting him do what his instincts were telling him to do, which was take all his naps on me.
Even now that he is 6 months old, he is just starting to take some naps on his own. He is getting good enough at sleeping and independent enough that most of the time he sleeps better when he’s alone.
But I made sure I waited until I could just lay him down awake and leave the room, because I do not have time to rock him to sleep for every nap.
Honestly though, I have enjoyed babywearing so much that I’m seriously sad that he’s moving to the next phase.
If you want some babywearing tips, go check out my playlist on YouTube!
Teach Your Toddler To Play Independently
The skill of independent play is so important for children to learn anyway, but, man oh man, does it free up a lot of time!
I started teaching Sofia to play independently around a year old. Because I knew I was going to be having a baby soon and I didn’t want her to always need me to play with her.
Obviously, one-on-one time is super important, and I play with her as often as I can, but I just wanted it to be an easier transition when Dimi came around.
She has become super independent now and even feeds herself for the most part. Which not only makes it less stressful for me when I need to nurse Dimi, but it has helped her flourish in becoming her own person!
So between them taking good naps, and her playing independently, I have some good stretches of time to accomplish what needs to be done around the house.
Create A “Safe Space” For Your Kids
Especially for Sofia, my toddler, this was so important!
We completely baby-proofed two rooms for her to be in. So our living room and kitchen are safe for her to run wild. The bathroom and bedroom doors lock and we have a baby gate at the stairs.
It is a little ridiculous to expect a toddler to behave all the time, they literally aren’t able to yet, their brains aren’t developed enough.
So I can’t expect her to not pull the vase off the coffee table or stick her fingers in the electrical sockets if she just unsupervised.
Obviously, we are gently teaching her not to do these things, but when I’m stuck to the couch nursing Dimi is not the time for that.
So having a safe space for them to be while I can’t stop them from doing naughty things has been vital! It isn’t good to be constantly yelling “No! No! Don’t touch that! Put that down!” from across the room while we can’t actually get to them.
Plus, they totally know that we can’t get over there fast enough. They have this antenna that picks up if their parent is just far enough away that they can grab your coffee and dump it down the front of themselves before you can stop em! (yes, totally true story)
It is desensitizing them to the word “no”. I want that to mean something when I say it. I try to only say “no” when I can actually help her stop doing something.
That has made it so much less frustrating for the both of us!!
You have to have a lot of grace for your older child. They have just been de-throned by a little baby and they are bound to act out in some way.
So I try to have a lot of patience with her and acknowledge her feelings. I also try to make sure if I’m not able to do that right then, that she is in a safe space where she won’t be tempted to get into anything.
You can totally do this!
I feel so blessed to be able to mother these two beautiful babes.
It is hard at times, and so overwhelming, but so wonderful, and it has shaped me and matured me as a woman.
Being a mom is such a balancing act and I am still trying to learn how to do this the best I can. I am still a really new mother, I’ve only been one for 21 months! Which seems crazy to me!
But I hope y’all enjoyed my tips for having 2 kids under 2 years old, and that it was a blessing and encouragement for new or expecting moms out there!
And blessing.
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My Tips For Having 2 Kids Under 2 Years Old
My two kids are 25 months apart, but a lot of these things still apply! For us, we bed share and that has really helped!